The abusive buyer

(Editor's note: This is the first in an occasional series of articles on the topic of the buyer-salesperson relationship.)

Put more than two salespeople around a table, and you have the equivalent of kids sitting around the campfire, eating marshmallows and telling horror stories. The only difference is that the ghosts and goblins of these tales are buyers. No “Freddie Krueger,” “Chucky,” or “Jason” is scarier than this group of characters.

These stories always arouse peals of nervous laughter, heads nodding in agreement, and a rush to be the next to top it with an even more outrageous account. What fascinates me is that when I ask the storyteller, “So what did you say back to him?” or “What did you do?” he always responds with a slightly embarrassed: “Nothing. I didn't say anything.”

God bless salespeople and their wonderful ability to withstand even the worst of encounters. They are the exact opposite of the stereotypical “outraged postal worker” or “trench coat mafia” member who seeks revenge in a blaze of bullets. They are, instead, so attuned to handling rejection and insults that they seemingly slough off these “slings and arrows” with a shrug and a laugh. If sociologists want to find a model for civilized behavior in an uncivilized world, they need look no further than the salesperson.

Although most buyers comport themselves in a businesslike manner, some don't—intentionally or not. The problem is that if no one says anything, there's no way for a buyer or their employer to know when they've stepped over the line from being a tough buyer to an abusive one.

Some might say that emotionally “beating up” a salesperson results in a better price. They could also say that it's just harmless fun because, after all, their buying decisions put a great deal of commission money in salespeople's pockets. They could even note that these salespeople whom they give a hard time to tend to laugh it off, and then ask the buyer to lunch, dinner or out for a drink. But the fact is that a salesperson can't afford to not try to maintain a relationship with a buyer, regardless of the buyer's behavior.

So why should buyers and their management care if a salesperson occasionally gets pushed around? After all, it may be good for business, and doesn't it just go with the territory? Not really. There are several reasons retailers should think about establishing guidelines for managing and monitoring such behavior.

Poor treatment of salespeople affects the bottom line. Punishing salespeople by not buying their products is bad business. Buying—or not buying—needs to be based upon maximizing profit and revenue, not as a way of exacting vengeance.

Such behavior can affect a retailer's ability to secure hot products when they want and need them. Salespeople do have some say in how products are allocated. It's a rare pleasure for salespeople to reward a buyer by routing hot products to those who treat them with respect, rather than those who torment them.

Tormenting a buyer or any individual over whom one has power is no less abusive than engaging in similar behavior with one's employees. It's simply unprofessional to do so in a work environment.

All of this raises a question: How do buyers and their employers know when they've crossed line from being effective to being abusive?

Here are some things to consider:

• Are buyers insulting or commenting on salespeople's intelligence, accent, ethnicity, race, gender, and/or religion? In other words, are their attempts at “humor” coming at the expense of what salespeople cannot change?
• Do buyers seemingly delight in embarrassing salespeople in front of the latter's bosses or principals by pointing out real or imagined deficiencies? This is particularly troubling if the buyers have never addressed these complaints privately.
• Do buyers chronically fail to respond to phone calls and/or emails? Do they excuse themselves by saying that they just get too many inquiries to respond?
• Are buyers chronically late for meetings and/or once there, do they rush through them? (An occasional lapse is fine, but a pattern of this behavior wastes a salesperson's time and money.)
• Do buyers punish salespeople for real or perceived personal slights? Have they consciously put them in the “dog house” by not buying from them regardless of the quality or value of their products?

Finally, what can senior retail management do to curtail abusive behavior? Here are some ideas:

• Post a salesperson abuse policy in a public place and craft it in the same way that you do when you are addressing abuse within your organization. Salespeople may be the last unprotected class of workers, but they're no less deserving of protection.
• Provide salespeople with a safe means of reporting abuse. They have a justified fear of retribution, so make sure that their anonymity is protected. If a company wants to know if one of their buyers is operating illegally or inappropriately, they must provide a safe way for salespeople to report inappropriate behavior.
• Follow up and protect salespeople with whom you've spoken. I cannot tell you the number of stories I've heard from salespeople who feel they have been punished by buyers for the seeming crime of “going over their heads.” If you recommend that your buyer see a product, follow up to find out what happened.

Treating people with dignity is always good business. More importantly, it's the right thing to do.